For the love of....COMICS!

Hello beautiful interweb peeps,

I hope everyone is doing lovely. I'm sure many of you are finishing up finals, papers or getting ready to graduate! If  you're getting ready to graduate, CONGRATULATIONS! You no longer have college to blame for your alcohol habit.

Today I shall talk about comics. YAY! As some of you may have gathered, I have a new found hobby of comic collecting. My collection is a dash of Green Arrow, a lot of Storm story arcs, a bunch of Skottie Young variant covers (I'm obsessed) and, a few other random comics here and there. So how the hell does a 26 year-old woman get into comic collecting? Oh you know a cute boy with a killer smile. Really, I got tired of being thoroughly confused when he'd go off on a 30 min tangent about The Scarlet Spider and I had no idea who or what he was talking about.

Today's post are just a few tips on dating someone who may be into that kind of thing. You never know when you are perusing through those online profiles and come across a cutie who happens to list comics in his interest section. Trust me you'll catch his attention immediately if you say something along the lines of "Sooo that Amazing Spider-man #700, was kinda crazy right?" or "Have you seen the Zebra Batman??" (Really, go look that one up, it's hilarious). 


1. Don't knock it, till you try it. 

I'll be honest, before when I heard about someone collecting comics, I did have this preconceived notion about the kind of people who collect and get excited about comics. In retrospect that's really dumb and juvenile. Don't pass someone up online that seems to be super into comics (or some other nerdy quirk), just because you really don't understand it. Trust me that's not what their entire life is all about. Just half of it (seriously). 

2. Ask. 

Simple right?  Don't try to fake it, till you make it. You'll look pretty dumb and he'll know, trust me. Not to mention he'll be so excited to tell you the entire history of the X-men if you ask. Also, here is where you will find out exactly what comics he does like and has and use that to your advantage when an anniversary, birthday, holiday or any gift exchanging event comes along. First Appearance or key issue comics are always good things to keep in mind. If he's a Green Arrow fan, maybe find out if he has a More Fun Comics #73. Maybe he loves Spider-Man, go put a bid in for an Amazing Spider-Man #300 (even better if it's signed by Stan Lee). BUT make sure you ask! Don't walk into a comic shop and just say "Well, I  think he likes Justice League" and then you buy a "New 52" comic that he probably already has and isn't worth much.

3. Find Your Niche.  

Now, I am not saying you need to actually start collecting. I'm just saying go do a little research and find a character or a series of comics that you think are interesting. If you like strong female characters, go read some Wonder Woman or Zatanna. If you're into sarcastic characters and humor, pick up some Deadpool. You don't have to buy the comics, go on comicvine.com and browse through the hundreds of character archives and bios on there. Also, pick up a graphic novel. If you've always been a Batman fan as a kid, read up on the different versions of Batman. Trust me there's a lot and it's confusing. Maybe try to understand the difference between the DC Universe, Earth 1 and Earth 2. Or why the hell there are so man damn Green Lanterns! Heck, if that's too much for you, take the latest super hero movie and try to get some background on it before you see the movie.

3. Talk about it! 

Once you have found your niche, talk about it with him. Yea sure you still may not know what the heck you're talking about but he will appreciate that you not only took the time to explore his interest, and you found something you can get excited about too. Something as simple as "I've noticed that Spider-Man wears a black suit sometimes, what is that all about" can be a really fun conversation. Also the answer to that question is pretty interesting ;).

4. Understand the Lingo. 

There will always be a unique set of words and phrases associated with a hobby or interest. At the very least, learn what those are. He may ask you to pick up 'bags and boards' on your way home from picking up dinner and you should know what that is. He's not talking about bags from the store or boards from Home Depot. You should probably know what a 'variant' cover is. Some can be worth a lot of money and make your comic nerd very happy if you come up on any he's into.
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And there you have it. My tips on dating someone who's into comics. Now if you'll excuse me I have comics that desperately need to be organized and archived.

Is there a cool hobby you're into that has put off potential mates? What other tips do you have for dating a nerd?? Any future topics you'd like to see? 

TA TA FOR NOW! 

The Pressure's On...

Hello lovelies,

Marriage. It's a topic that seems to be following me every single day lately. Probably because I am a 26, with my first degree and the next "logical" step is to get married. Almost every little girl dreams of her fairy tale wedding. Complete with a shit ton of guests, the perfect matching napkins, flawless make-up and of course your prince charming standing at the end of the aisle.

Yea, I didn't dream of that. I pushed marriage out of my head at a really young age for a very, very long time. Instead of a white dress, I dreamed of multiple graduation gowns. Instead of man's last name behind my first, I wanted either J.D. or Dr. to accompany my last.

 Then the last semester of my Bachelor's came and I realized that a good portion of the friends were engaged, getting married, already married or in serious relationships. Log onto Facebook and every other day a new "blah girl is engaged [or married] to blah boy". I started to re-think my career decisions, my choice of life style...everything. All because I really started to see that the pressure (seemed) to be on for me to have my shit together, settle down and get married.

Let's just say I snapped out of that mindset real fast.  Don't get me wrong, I am happy for anyone who decides to make that leap. Good for you. Marriage really is a beautiful thing. I am lucky that my parents are still married and I can see first hand what it really means to be married and love someone unconditionally, even if they don't deserve it sometimes. What I am not okay with is society basically telling me that I need to be at that point right now. I have had women flat out  tell me that I should be in that mindset. Or confused, because I don't want to get married right now. Why? because my "clock" is ticking or I am not getting any younger. Some of you may be thinking "well that's just lingering feelings from older generations". Nope some of these are girls my own age, even younger.

I realize that this post is not really related to online dating.  However, it is related to dating in general. Sometimes we get so wrapped in the fairy tale ending that we forget to have fun in our relationships. We place these huge expectations and timelines that makes us forget to live and learn about each other at a normal pace. It makes me sad, really. Trust me this doesn't only apply to marriage. I was so concentrated on making a name for myself that I forgot to live. I became this mean, cold, distant person because I gave myself an artificial timeline. Which, by the way I am pretty far from at this point. However, I am okay with that, life happens.

 I need to say that I, Tia, am okay with not being married right now. That I do not feel like I need to pressure the person who I am dating to to put a ring on my finger because that's what's "suppose" to happen. Would it be nice one day? Yea, one day when I am not living paycheck to paycheck. When I can come home every day from a career that I love and know I am making a difference at. When I know that BOTH of us are ready mentally, physically and financially for that next step. Could be in 2 years could be in 10, I have no idea and I don't CARE right now. Why should I add that extra pressure to a relationship? It paints people into an artificial box that can lead to resentment. I've seen it first hand., many times. I've experienced it and it does not feel good. I don't want to be painted into a box and I sure as hell don't want to lose the man that I love because I keep saying "so uhh when we getting married?".

What do you think? Do you feel pressured to get married? Heck, maybe you like the pressure? Let's have a conversation.

Until then, I need chocolate and to catch up on Doctor Who.