Hello beautifuls,
Today's post is not a story, or an advice column, or a sarcastic post about how pig headed men can be (though ladies, we can be quite the pigs also). Nope, this is just my final farewell post.
There comes a time in a young blogger's life when you just have to hang up the space bar. Nah, I'm just moving on to another project that will be part of my ultimate life goal that involves getting more underrepresented students to college.
I pretty much stopped writing because I left the online dating world to finally "settle" down and honestly I kinda ran out of stories. It's been a lot of fun sharing my unfortunate mishaps with you guys. I hope out of the 4,000 views this blog has gotten, at least half of them got a a laugh, smile or at least a "well, my dating life isn't THAT bad" out of you.
Ok nevermind, here's some advice...
1. Be vulnerable.
"The hell Tia? Since when have you been vulnerable!?" Just recently actually. Open yourself and allow yourself to be happy. This doesn't just apply to dating. It applies to every aspect of our lives. Friends, family, our careers, new experiences. I, for one, HATE being vulnerable. It's scary as shit and my friends can tell you that I call them frequently freaking out about it. Being vulnerable means that someone else has the power to control how you're feeling at any given moment without your permission. Bullshit, right? It also means that in that instant that you're being vulnerable it can open us up to some amazing times, conversations and self-discovery. Let me tell you from experience, to be closed off and close minded is a lonely place that will just leave you bitter and you will continue to have horror date stories until you get over yourself and brush that chip off your shoulder. Yes, we all have had our hearts broken. We have had our hearts ripped out of our chests and our dreams smashed, sometimes in the matter of minutes. Some of us are still reeling from that man who cheated on us, or left without an explanation. Maybe we are the ones that fucked up and we are still in the process coming to terms with it and forgiving ourselves. Find out what is getting you so down and bitter and work through it. Be honest with yourself and find someone who won't judge you for your past. It will be hard, you will cry and your friends will wonder what the hell is wrong with you, but ultimately you'll be a happier and enlightened individual. At least that's the goal.
2. Try stuff.
A dear friend and mentor of mine recently passed away. It was hard for me because she was an amazing woman who is partially responsible for the woman I am today. Whenever I told her I wanted to do something, no matter how drastic it was, she simply said, "Then do it, you know you can". I envy my Facebook friends who seem to go off and do all of these amazing things and trips and have so many awesome experiences. Finally I realized I needed to stop being envious and just do stuff and have fun and not such a stick in the mud about it. You have to do stuff guys. I know that sounds trivial, but if you're on a date and he suggests something off the wall that you couldn't see yourself doing before, why don't you just do it? If it's illegal, don't do it, that's stupid...seriously. You think you're not the camping type because you haven't gone since you were 8 years old. For God's sake, go on the damn trip now that you're 22 and dating a hottie. Experience nature from a new perspective you may learn something. This last Spring Break I was helping track down and recover a damn weather balloon down in the middle of nowhere Ohio. It was probably the most fun I have had in awhile. Just go out and have fun! Make a fun story out of your life!
3. We are all stories in the end...
The Doctor said it best when he said "We are all stories in the end" (yes, I am quite the nerd these days, can you tell?). It wasn't until I graduated from college when I really understood what this meant. It's easy for us to judge and point and laugh and say "psft I would have never done it that way" or "how could she/he do that...!" I really think as a society we need to stop and take a look at ourselves. Every single person handles life differently as as it comes at us and who are we to judge how someone else runs their lives? I realize this is a lesson that will probably never happen to the majority of our society. I guess I can just hope to pass this down to any child that happens to come out of me. So the next time you hear or see a strange situation, don't instantly think "I'm better than you because I wouldn't do it that way", just walk away and think "Eh, just different, whatever". Even if you see a woman shaving her face during rush hour traffic, yes her face. It's different, but eh, maybe she didn't have time to shave at home and she had a very important interview she was about to be late too. We just never know ;).
That is all I have for you. Thank you for joining me on this journey and reading my non-sense. I hope you all find what makes you happy. Whether it's a man (or girl) to share those life experiences with, a new career, or something as simple as a new comic to look forward to every week. All I ask is you find your happy.
ALLONS-Y!
-Tia
