Pizza Face

Morning!

Let me start off this short post with a quick background on my personal preference in men...at least physically. I am a mixed, half black & white woman. I only date white men. Yes, yes make all the judgments and comments you want, I've gotten it all.

Now, I always get the question from men, "Why do you only date white guys?" and my standard response is something along the lines of, "The same reason you like a particular kind of pizza over another...you just do".

So I get a message this morning asking the "Why do you only date white guys?", I send my standard response...and this is what he tells me...

 "Hope you like pepperoni on your white men! I have lots of acne...lol. jk."

Yea...that's not cute. I responded with "lol". You know the universal response that means 'I have no idea what to say right now'? ...Awkward! 

Pet Peeves

I've been at this online dating game for...uh too long. Over the years I've seen the same general things come up that drive me bonkers (yea, that's right I just dropped that word). Here are my top 4 online dating message fails...

1. Grammar


You know when a status/tweet is riddled with grammatical errors that would make any educated soul cringe in frustration? Yea well, it's even more annoying when you get a message from a potential mate and he just can't seem to get a hold of the English language. Sometimes I've thought "....well maybe English is his 2nd language?". Now, I am not saying I have flawless grammar. My grammar Nazi ex-boyfriend can attest to that. BUT, it's a real turn off when someone doesn't know the difference between 'their/there/they're', or spells 'boring' as 'boaring'...yes that happened. 


2. One Word Messages 


This drives me INSANE! Especially, when it is the first message from someone. How am I suppose to engage in a conversation when they only say "Hi". It's like those awkward few seconds when you're stuck in an elevator with someone. You know those situations where you awkwardly smile at the person and say "Hi" as if that's the socially acceptable thing to do? Yea...awkward. That's how I feel. 
You know what though?  They were probably browsing around and were swept away by my stellar smile and became speechless (lol). GAH! At least come up with a clever pick up line, maybe something like...
"Do you have any Gallifreyan in you? No? Do you want some?"--Eh, eh, Doctor Who? Anyone, anyone? Ok fine..moving on...


3. Weed/Alcohol/Gangster References 


Really? Some of these fellas really think the way to a woman's heart is through illegal activity & substances. Well shit, when did I miss that memo? A couple weeks ago I had a guy message me (who btw, also successfully completed the first two pet peeves) who's default image was his "perscription" weed bottle, with his wonderfully colored bong. The next image was his can of Four Locos and the last one? I'm pretty sure he was faded with his friends. Also, their profile only says something along the lines of "YOLO". So apparently they're living their life to the fullest as they slowly (yet surely) kill off all their brain cells. Yea no, I'm good on that one. Thanks for the message though. 
(Fun fact: I just learned that YOLO means 'you only live once'. I think that I need to accept that once you're into your mid-twenties you start to fall behind on the cool lingo of the times.)


And finally...


4. Copy & Paste.


Thank you computer engineering geniuses who came up with that one. You made this world so much better with just the click of the control (or command) button. However, you also made a new age of lazy ass non-creative bums. Yes boys, we can tell when you copy and pasted (is that a word?) that message over 100 times to every cute woman you found on the website. I especially love when I get the same copy & paste message from a guy multiple times. My sister called someone out on their mishap yesterday, he was quite taken a back when she pointed it out. He was embarrassed, she laughed and blocked him. HA. 
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Do you agree with these? Do you have any stories or pet peeves that drive you up the wall and lose hope in humanity for a split second? LET ME KNOW! <3