Sunday, March 24, 2013

Stood Up Lately?

Greetings!

Two posts, two days in a row! Whoa that's a record even for me!

Today I bring you a story, that I completely forgot about until I was talking to a dear from college who was able to pull it out of my subconscious.

About three years ago I was semi seeing this dude. He was super busy and always traveling so it was bound to never work. But he could hold his liquor and was good company for awhile. My priorities were a bit skewed back then. Anyways, one night we make plans  to hang out and catch up after not seeing each other for almost a month.

The night we planned comes, I text him about an hour before to make sure he wasn't flaking on me (which he had a tendency of doing because of work). 30 minutes goes by and no response. An hour comes and goes, 3 hours comes and goes...nothing. He never showed up. Naturally, I had a combination of panic and pure irritation.

The next day happens and I still haven't heard from him. Of course I text him to see what was going but all of my texts went unanswered. Finally, after a week of not hearing him I decided to let it go and move on. He drifted off into space to the point of no return. I kinda figured he got back with his ex or ended up being somewhere for work for a long time and his phone was swallowed up by a shark while he was deep sea diving?  I don't know, I was over it.

2 months pass and I get a text message from a mysterious number that says something along the lines of "hey this is Stan [yea, that's a fake name]. I am so sorry about a couple months ago, I was in a coma"

...Now anyone who knows me, can probably figure out my facial expression and initial response at this point. I mean really, I've heard a lot of excuses and been stood up a good amount of times, but being in coma, I was impressed.

As the conversation went on I realized he was actually telling the truth. He got into a terrible car accident the night before we were suppose to hang out and was in a coma for 2 weeks. Pair that a bad broken leg and arm and probably a bunch of other stuff. Naturally, I felt like an asshole by the end of this conversation and while I had no intentions of seeing him anymore we did met up for dinner a couple nights later to clear the air and just decided it's best to be friends from that point forward.

So the moral of the story? Sometimes, ladies, when a guy mysteriously doesn't text you back, like ever, even after a really good first date. Maybe call around to the local hospitals, he could just be in a coma and there may still be a future for you two yet! Right after physical therapy and probably some counseling.

Anyone else have funny (or many not so funny) stories about being stood up?

Till we meet again,
ADIOS!

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Isn't that weird?

Hello lovelies,

My life has consisted of school and work with a dash of traveling. Spring break is here and I'm finding myself cramming all my work into 3 days so I can actually enjoy my Spring Break trip. Even though the destination of said trip is far from the usual sunny and Cancun like experience. No 'Girls Gone Wild' experiences here! My Dad would be proud. Lol.

Today's post comes to you because of a question I'm always asked when the topic of  online dating comes up. My  line of work allows me to do a lot of public speaking. I am so fortunate to meet so many amazing and inspirational people who want to do just as much good as I want to for my community.

Once an event is over, I find myself spending time with the people over food and drinks. As the drinks flow and the finger foods disappear from our tiny plates the topic of dating (or marriage) usually comes up. No matter the age, race, gender, or sexual orientation, it seems to have a way of creeping into the conversation. I also noticed that there's a very high likelihood that someone at the table met their significant other with the help of the internet. At this point people begin sharing horror stories, their own stories, their friend of a friend of a cousin's stories, etc. Being the low-level and inconsistent blogger than I am, I typically interject with something along the lines of,  "Oh yea online dating is fun. So much fun I had to write a blog about it".

Online dating in 2013 is a lot different than it was say 10 or even 5 years ago. It's becoming okay to say, "Oh we met online on [insert website here]", without having to make up an intricate lie about how you really met (been there done that). In a lot of these online dating situations they may not meet their love interests for weeks, month, or even years. But, despite the lack of the initial physical contact they are still developing very real feelings for someone that they probably only know as a voice, Facebook message or occasional Skype chat. Yup, that's quite a complicated situation to be in. MTV Catfish anyone?

So yes, relationships beginning online, while complicated at times, are becoming more common these days. But that doesn't mean that people won't judge you for it. Let's go back to my hypothetical post-conference setting.

INT. APPLEBEE'S - NIGHT (Hehe yup, I was a film major for a split second as a freshman)
Cool person 1: "Oh that's nice you met your boyfriend online! That wasn't weird??"
Me (usually in defense for someone else): "Well it's not so much weird as it is semi-unconventional. As long as you're safe, stick to what you want in a mate by not compromising your standards, and also have a good grasp on who you are as a person.  You really don't have to much to be worried about"
Cool person 4: "But what if they are a weirdo and you get murdered, like by the Craig's list killer?!"
Me:  "Well then that sounds like a great plot line for an episode of Criminal Minds, don't you think?
I've never actually said that last line. Seriously though, I get the question a lot. I've also gotten the murder line more times than I can count as well. Even some of my friends have suggested how "weird" it is. Yes, I will admit it is a bit out of the ordinary to meet someone online. However, I also think it's amazing that the phrase "there are plenty of fish in the sea"  has a whole new meaning.  Why does it have to be weird for two people who would have never crossed paths to make a real connection before the prospects of meeting is every mentioned? It's so cool to see so many websites geared towards specific interests even for people who would probably have a hard time in mainstream dating.

Is safety a concern in these situations? Yes and I have given plenty of friend's advice on the first offline meet up. Please try to refrain from being a late night news story and the top 'have you seen me' shared story on Facebook. It really would not be a good idea to run off with the first guy who made you feel pretty without ever confirming he is who he says he is. We live in the Google age, use it. On the flip side, how many stories have we seen where two people meet the "normal" way, date for awhile and get married. Only to find out a year later that they are living a secret life with three kids and a wife in Maui, have the Chinese mob after them for unpaid gambling debt and wanted for murder in Nepal? You get the point.

So there you have it. NO, it's not weird that you met your mate online and screw anyone who tries to tell you otherwise.

I leave you with a bit of nerd humor. Anyone else as excited as I am for the Doctor Who premiere next Saturday!?




Till next time,
GERONIMO!