HELLO OUT THERE!
Yes, yes I know I have denied many of you the joys of
laughing at my unfortunate love life. However, I’m willing to bet that you are
doing just fine laughing at your own love lives. Am I right? It’s okay to nod. I
won’t judge.
Before I begin, I need to note that I am still out of the online dating game; I don’t
even have an active profile anywhere. I’m quite content where I stand in my
love life. That said, I was browsing my ideas folder and found a lot of material
to work with…so here we go!
My Top 5 Profile Picture Annoyances
The Middle Finger
Remember in 5th grade when you and your friends
learned what the middle finger was
and it was the coolest thing to do until the end of 5th grade? Yea,
well that’s about how you look if you’re sticking up your middle finger,
expecting to find a woman to take you seriously. It’s trashy, just put your
hand down next time you snap a photo.
Your Car
Dear God, does this drive me insane
(no pun intended). Now, let me begin by saying that I think it’s fantastic that
the potential date has a vehicle, A rare find in the online dating world. I do
not think it’s fantastic that it’s the first thing I see before I even click on
their screen name. I didn't realize that OKCupid also doubles as a cars
classified section. I mean, come on guys! Why do you think we want to see 5-20
pictures of your 2001 Honda Accord?
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| You want some of that? |
Internet Memes
Anyone who knows me knows that I’m kind of addicted to the internet.
It’s a problem…really. Who doesn't like a good, “Y U NO” meme? I don’t like when
it’s the main picture! Yes, it shows you might
have a sense of humor. It also shows that you’re too chicken shit to actually
take the time to put up a decent picture of yourself. If I wanted to click through
an endless supply of memes, I’d go to Pinterest. Thanks though!
Posing with a Female in a Not so Platonic Way
Believe it or not, I've seen this a lot. Let’s paint a
picture for you now…take a good looking man (insert race here), posing for a
picture (let’s say a party?), with a woman KISSING him! YES! Please explain to
me, WHY this is even considered as a main picture. The only time that this is
ok is if you’re on craigslist... and…well I’ll let your imagination go wild.
Once, I responded to the message of said person’s photo and his response was “Oh,
well I liked my smile in it”. Seriously…gah. moving on.
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| You get the picture. |
Baby Pictures
There's a serious creep factor for a man to post a picture
of himself when he was a mere 5 years-old. What’s worse is he expects me to
click on the photo because he thinks I’ll be mesmerized by his adorable
dimples? Maybe, I’m alone in this opinion, but if I click on John Doe’s toddler
photo, that is a red flag that I may be a pedophile. A label I don’t ever want associated
with my name. What would that message to him look like anyways, “Hey! Nice
tricycle!!”
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| It happens. |
Happy dating lovelies! <3 nbsp="nbsp" p="p">
